Bunnies - Not A Giant Problem


Contrary to popular belief, they are in fact not a fuzzy yet vicious little buggers that blight our world.

From a certain point of view that is. Namely one very tall view. Bunnies are nothing more than adorable little balls of fluff that make cute little squeaking noises when you push them. Of course you have to be very gentle and not push them too hard. Otherwise they may just stop squeaking all together. And no one wants that.

However if you’re a little closer to the ground and tending to a vegetable patch, then it’s likely your view of bunnies is quite different. After all the hard work you’ve put into your turnips and tomatoes, that is understandable. But those bunnies still are not the heinous vermin some would have you believe.

What is occurring is people are confusing bunnies with their evil cousins - the jackalope. From outward appearances the jackalope is for all intents and purposes a bunny. So the mistake is an easy one to make. But often the last you do.

Jackalopes have the long ears, pelts of the same quality, buck teeth, fluffy tails, and big hind feet that you associate with the common bunny. They are often found in groups, as well. But that’s where the similarities end.

Courtesy of  Nora Sherwood

Courtesy of Nora Sherwood

The antlers should be a give dead give away that what you’re dealing with is not a bunny. But when viewed at a distance or against the brush a jackalope’s antlers can easily be confused with the branches of a bush. Petting one such creature, if you can even get it to remain still long enough to do so, generally results in a lot of pain and curses - for you. Not the bunny-look-alike.

What really differentiates the jackalope from the common bunny is their behavior. Where a bunny is content to nibble on plants, which can be annoying when those plants are your prized radishes, jackalopes are keen hunters. Most of the time they constrain themselves to hunting smaller creatures - insects, rodents, birds, lizards and the like.

But it is not unheard of a group of jackalope, also known as legion, taking on a lone human. Or toying with a troll, even if they would actually be incapable of taking such a creature down. Jackalopes dart in and strike with quick nips of their teeth, filed to razor sharpness on the bones of their previous prey. If they need to strike at something bigger they’ll utilize their antlers to impale their mark. To come under attack by the a legion of jackalope is to die by a thousand cuts, that pass in a blur. For like their cousins the bunnies, jackalopes too are quick on their feet.

Some travelers have said they’ve seen the jackalope honing their antlers on the rocks near their sanctums. But no confirmed sightings of such behavior have been recorded. What little is known of their social dynamics comes from watching legions hunt. They are known to employ a variety of tricks, some of which it is believed they learned by watching the goblins in the more remote reaches of the realm.

So be warned about approaching any bunny-like creatures. You may be faced with something else entirely.